Giving a lot of time
When you hear adults lovingly describing their Mum or Dad, they use one phrase over and over.
When you hear adults lovingly describing their Mum or Dad, they use one phrase over and over.
They spent a lot of time with me.
I was struck by Simon Black’s description of his late father in this interview, at 2:41:
There is something in the parent-child dynamic that goes beyond just needing quality time. Quantity matters too.
The difficulty in being a parent is that ‘a lot of time’ is the exact opposite of what you have.
Not a lot of time. And not a lot of energy.
It is a constant struggle to push back on the ocean of demands and create the space to be present and energetic with a child for ‘a lot of time’.
Among the many roles of a good parent, this is one of the most difficult.
I hope one day my son describes me in Simon Black’s words: A great friend, and a wonderful father, who gave me a lot of time.
Time matters. But to give it requires daily effort, and a constant mindfulness.